WARNING: the following is a Stitch Up and shouldn't be taken seriously by anyone for any reason.
Wests' Tigers announced earlier in the year that, then Captain, Robbie Farah was not wanted by the club and free to explore opportunities elsewhere. Apparently this greatly upset Farah who was determined to burrow in like a tick in a fox-hole and see out the remaining two years and reported $2.1 million of his contract. Jason Taylor in a move of pure spite, told Farah that if he stayed with the club, the closest he would get to the NRL is row ten in the stands at ANZ Stadium.
After several months of a tense and awkward stalemate Robbie Farah today formally asked Tigers CEO Justin Pascoe and Coach Jason Taylor for a release to join the Roosters.
This is that discussion.
Farah: Jason, Justin, I think I owe you both the respect to let you know that I've found someone else. I'm moving on. I guess you finally get what you've wanted for the last couple of months. I just want to make this a clean break. I just want to take my $2.1 million and leave. We don't need to make this difficult.
Taylor and Pascoe glance at each other.
Taylor: No. We're not parting ways. You're not going anywhere. You're staying put. You are ours.
Farah: What? You said you didn't want me around! You said you didn't love me anymore! Are you telling me that when I finally find someone that I can be myself around and be happy with, that you're not going to let me go?
Pascoe: That's exactly what we're saying.
Farah: You've been telling everyone we know how horrible and moody I am. How you can't wait to see the back of me. Now you won't let me go? Now you want me to stay?
Taylor: Yes Robbie. Please don't leave us. We're nothing without you.
Farah: Well it's too late Jason! I'm gone! I didn't want this to get messy. I thought I was doing what you both wanted. You said you wanted me to leave!
Pascoe: We were just bluffing Robbie. We need you. We can change!
Farah: No you can't Justin. You and Jason are exactly the same: incapable of change. You're small little boys playing games. Well I'm sick of playing your demented mind games. I'm sick of you playing with my emotions. If you won't let me go to the Roosters, then this will get nasty, I promise you.
Pascoe and Taylor glance at each other again.
Taylor: Well it would seem as though your mind is made up then Robbie.
Pascoe: There's nothing we can say to make you change your mind and stay with us?
Farah: No Justin, I'm afraid there's not.
Pascoe pulls a Swiss Army knife from his pocket, while Taylor reaches for a stapler on a table. They move toward Farah menacingly.
Taylor: Well Robbie, if we can't have you, no one can.
Farah: Wait. Fellas. Let's talk about this.
Pascoe: It's too late for talk Robbie....